Fake News: Public thrashing for ‘anti-Royalist’ schoolboys
Original Fiction – for adult eyes only
Public thrashing for ‘anti-Royalist’ schoolboys
By C. P. Macaning,
Brocklehurst Bugle.
Three boys were beaten by
their headmaster in front of a specially convened school assembly after they ‘campaigned’
against the new Queen Elizabeth II.
It happened at St Francis
Independent School in Brocklehurst.
The three boys – all senior
sixth-formers and aged 18 – had paraded a home-made banner with an anti-Royalist
slogan around the school’s playground.
One pupil at the school who
did not want to be named for fear of the consequences told the Bugle:
“It was just a joke. Nobody took it seriously. But they’re not laughing now.”
The incident happened after
three Republican sympathisers were arrested in Brocklehurst town centre on
Saturday for demonstrating against His Majesty King George VI who died this
week. “The lads got the idea from that,” our informer said.
St Francis – known
affectionately in the town as St FIGS – prides itself on being a traditional
school: traditional curriculum, traditional sports, traditional uniform and, of
course, traditional discipline.
Headmaster Dr S. O.
Henderson-Smith refused to comment on the public thrashing but many of the
school’s pupils were eager to discuss it on condition of anonymity.
One senior boy told the Bugle:
“Boys are sometimes caned in front of the whole school but that’s at morning
assembly. This was the first time anyone can remember that we’ve had a special congregation
just for a thrashing.”
A junior said: “It was
awesome. You could have heard a pin drop when the three boys were marched into
the hall. All the senior masters were on the stage waiting. The boys were lined
up, standing to attention, and they had to wait a long time before the
headmaster paraded into the hall.”
Other informants told the Bugle
that after a short speech the headmaster ordered each boy to step forward one
at a time. “They had to lower their trousers and stretch across a big table
that had been put on stage specially for the thrashing,” one sixth-former said.
“Even from the back of the hall you could see them trembling. They were
terrified.”
Another boy said: “I had a
perfect view. The boys had already taken off their blazers so were only in
their shirts. Mr MacMaster, the deputy head, stepped forward and with quite a
flourish adjusted the boy’s shirt so that it was well away from the backside.
Then he pulled at the underpants and I could see that they fitted like a second
skin. When he had done this, he stood back and let the headmaster do his duty.”
A heavy cane, with the
traditional curved handle, had previously been brought onto the stage. Some
reports say there were several canes and it was speculated this was necessary
in case a cane split due to the ferocity of the beating.
The headmaster, who has a
reputation as a stern disciplinarian and an enthusiast for corporal punishment,
spared no effort. The crack of cane across stretched underpants resounded
around the great hall. Each swipe was greeted with an appropriate response of
agony from the recipient.
It is believed each sixth-former
was given twelve of the best.
One witness told the Bugle:
“I doubt if there was one boy in the hall who didn’t wince and flinch as each
stroke hit home. There but the Grace of God and all that. But, at the end of
the day, we all thought it was a jolly good show. There’s nothing finer than
seeing another chap get a whacking and knowing that you’re not going to be
next.”
The punishment took less than
five minutes and at the end the boys were helped from the stage and out of the
hall by senior prefects who had been placed on duty for this purpose.
The funeral of His Majesty
King George VI takes place on Monday.
Picture credit:
Unknown.
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